Friday, March 2, 2012

Help or Hinderance?

We all like to be helpful, we at least we believe that we like to be helpful. How often does our ever so well meaning 'help' turn into a hindrance for the person we are trying to help?

How often do we stop and assess if this person really needs our help. Is it more that we don't like the way this person is doing something so we try to override it by offering our 'well meaning help' aka your way isn't working so how about we do it my way approach.

As a married woman I know this scenario all to well...

According to Scripture we are called to be our husbands 'help mate'. So doesn't that give me a license to 'help' him by telling him when he isn't doing things right (and yes by right we all mean our way).


Because as women we are wired to help, how do we most effectively be our husbands 'help mate'.
HELP...
I think a lot of it comes down to our reasons for helping. Have we been asked to help or are we offering unsolicited advice? We may think our way is best and it may be the best way for us to complete or accomplish something. But it doesn't necessarily mean it's the right solution for someone else.

Obviously this is not limited to spousal situations. It can happen in all walks of life, whether it be friendships, relationships with parents, siblings, family members, people in authority.

The challenge we all face is learning to determine when we are offering to help out of pure concern and a desire to see the person we are trying to help succeed. If this is our motive then that's great. However too often I believe motives can become self focused and we offer to help to make ourselves feel needed and therefore better than the person we are trying to help or at least feel that our way is better than their way. This is when we become a hindrance and we need to admit to this (at least to ourselves) and make a conscious effort to be a help and not a hindrance.
HINDRANCE...
Today, are we going to be a help or a hindrance....The decision and outcome are completely up to YOU and ME!

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